Babylonian professions
Nowadays, when a President or Prime Minister is looking for advice, they consult with lawyers, doctors, academics, accountants, and pychologists. All these professionals existed in Babylon, but under different names. There were no continuing education requirements or licensing boards. You didn’t even have to attend Hogwarts to be a certified magician. And you weren't limited to what the college offered. So there were a lot more interesting professions back then.
Nebuchadnezzar, king of Babylon, had the best necromancers, astrologers, sorcerers, magicians, demonologists, and Wise Men available to consult, whenever he felt like it. Also Kasdim. Kasdim were the elite of the astrologers, and Nebuchadnezzar himself happened to be a Kasdi, so he talked to them first when he needed advice.
The Kasdim were experts in astronomy. Age is counted by solar and lunar years. Astrologers were not fortune tellers, but rather functioned more like physicians, and would use urine, blood samples, and star interpretations from the person’s date of birth to treat diseases.
I have used modern doctors, and it turns out that they also use age, blood, and urine samples to treat people. Not a single doctor has ever asked me to describe what the stars looked like the night I was born. Perhaps that would explain a lot, if they knew how to use the information. But alas, they are only doctors. Not astrologers.
Feminism did not exist back then. For example, Wise Man counted as a profession, but not Wise Woman. With rare exceptions, only men were used as executioners, judges, officers in the army, soldiers, and gladiators, and every other job. There was no suffrage for anyone. Slave was one of the few positions open to women as well as men. Spouse also. But they are pretty much the same thing. Things are a lot better today, now that woman are not barred from nearly all jobs, but they are also a lot more boring. All done with the politically incorrect jokes for now.
Today we have nerdy computer programmers, who have replaced the entertaining magicians. Hedge fund managers, who replaced the alchemists, by turning everything into money instead of metals into gold. And lawyers instead of executioners. At least lawyers, when they make a mistake, only take your money, and not your head.
On that note, I would like to rewrite the conversation between Nebuchadnezzar and the Kasdim in chapter 2 of the book of Daniel.
Nebuchadnezzar: (wakes up disturbed from dream. Depending which commentary you believe, he remembers nothing, something, or all of it but doesn't want to tell anyone.)
Nebuchadnezzar: Kasdim! Astrologers! Magicians! Necromancers! Wise men! I need you to divine some information with your incredible powers that you have long boasted about.
Kasdim, thrilled to be called: Your servant would absolutely love to serve Your Majesty. Please tell your humble servants the dream.
Nebuchadnezzar: I don't remember the dream. Divining things is your job. Your job is to give me information, not the other way around. You always said that you can read minds and access supernatural knowledge.
Kasdim, patiently, and a little stressed: Tell us the dream, and give your humble servants time to divine the interpretation.
Nebuchadnezzar: No, you tell ME the dream.
Kasdim: (begin to protest)
Nebuchadnezzar: You are wasting my time. You must be insufficiently motivated to serve me. If you don't tell me the dream within 3 days, I will have you and your families torn limb from limb, and your neighborhood will be converted into garbage dumps for the rest of the kingdom. (My modern translation of 'dung heaps'. NIMBY isn't new either.)
Kasdim, somewhat stressed at this point: What the king asks for is impossible. No human being on this earth can tell someone what they dreamed. This is also unfair, as no other king has ever demanded this of their wise men.
Nebuchadnezzar: Life is not fair. Who cares what other kings have done? Here I am, the great Nebuchadnezzar, and they've been conquered. If you think this is impossible, you are worth nothing to me. I must destroy all of academia akasdemia ( I take credit for this terrible pun connecting Kasdim to Akasdemics academics, which I will repeat at every opportunity.)
Arioch! You're my Chief Executioner! I hope you do your job better than the Kasdim did!
Arioch, the chief executioner: Yes, your Majesty!
Nebuchadnezzar: I hereby decree that all the wise men, astrologers, magicians, and necromancers shall be killed. Start with the ones right here, who refuse to tell me my dream.