En espaƱol: Feliz dia de la basura
There are many traditional holidays in the calendar. Recently, many have been changed or added or discarded. Perhaps we need a different type of holiday, which would make everyone happy.
Isha Yiras Hashem would like to introduce the most non-controversial, non-denominational, non-stressful holiday ever: Garbage Day!
It would be an opportunity to thank G-d for the fact that we are producers and not users of garbage. Psalms 113 is particularly appropriate. "He lifts the person who has nothing up from the dust, from (picking through) the garbage He raises up the needy, to seat him with the princes."
Like garbage itself, Garbage Day would transcend cultural, religious, and political boundaries. It would be a day where we can all come together and celebrate the best reason to pay taxes: centralized waste management.
Even children will be on high alert for the sound of the garbage truck, which can be heard from a great distance. Adults begin gathering around the windows or doors, anticipation filling the air, preparing to celebrate the arrival of the garbage truck. Everyone must be in their places before the smell of garbage begins to permeate the air.
At last, the huge, mighty, and intimidating garbage truck approaches. The thundering noise drowns out all other whining or bickering. Then the brave people put the garbage in the truck, every so often causing the machine to crush it all. This is a sight to behold.
These brave people are Garbage Collectors, and they are known to smile and wave to ordinary citizens. They clean the world we live in. If they notice you, you can feel elite, as if newly inducted into the Garbage Appreciation Society. Sometimes they will give autographs, but you can only ask once in your lifetime.
Why do we need Garbage Day? Firstly, Garbage Day isn't something you have to wait for, and it requires no preparation. Most of us can celebrate it at least once a week. Secondly, Garbage Day is a reminder that all of humanity is equal and must work together. No matter who you are, or what you believe, you need a Garbage Day to dispose of the trash in your life. Finally, Garbage Day has absolutely no impact on either parking rules or employment. It is intended to be incorporated as a joyous part of everyday life.
Many people find tremendous meaning in the sense of renewal that Garbage Day brings to their lives. The Garbage Truck leaves, bearing everything they have disposed of.
They say goodbye to the things they have discarded and pray to G-d that each item will find its way to a proper destination. Then they return to their home, and replace the garbage bag in the kitchen garbage can, feeling grateful for another functional week of garbage pickup.
Garbage Day is not a divisive holiday, but that doesn't mean it is boring. It holds universal interest and could generate lively debate. Here are some conversational suggestions.
"Did your Garbage Collector smile at you today? Mine waved! I think he recognized me from last week!"
"Rats keep on chewing into my garbage bin. I'm embarrassed for the Garbage Collectors to see it. How can these holes be patched?"
"How can we put more stuff into recycling?"
"I have been putting a GPS tracker in the garbage every week, and it's fascinating to see where it goes.ā
"How can I keep my new soda habit a secret from the Garbage Collectors? I'll have to go back to drinking sink water."
āDid you see the Garbage Collector on television yesterday? He was explaining how he handles crime evidence found in the garbage!ā
Conversations like these encourage small talk and healthy debate, and unite humanity to a common purpose. Let's cheer the unsung heroes who keep our homes and streets clean, and whose weekly presence proves that the government is functioning. Join me in the weekly celebration of Garbage Day.
Wishing you a joyous Garbage Day this week and every week!
Isha Yiras Hashem
Note: Waste management is an essential, important and difficult job. Those who do it do not get enough attention or credit in proportion to the importance of their work. You can thank them every day, not only on Garbage Day.
I had one more bag to bring out this morning, but the truck had already come and gone. So now the bag has to marinate for a week. We need a Garbage Day Sheini!
I actually heard a radio program describing how, in one community, people go around leaving their neighbors notes (aka tickets) about how well they separated their garbage! For example, they might write someone up for too much food garbage in the trash pail when I'm should be in the compost pail. I'm so glad people aren't walking by and judging my garbage!! I have plenty of things to be judged about already!